The Power of Vulnerability and the Paradox of Power.  By Mark Bloome

When I was a little boy I was very sensitive and felt a lot, but in my family there was neither place nor words for feelings.  Growing up, my mother would say, “Mark, you are too sensitive” as I would weep uncontrollably.  My father was a tragic figure of his times as he could express no other feeling but anger, so much so that when his wife of 50 years died, he cried not a tear. 

I promised myself that when I grew up and had a son that I would teach him to be sensitive and have words for his feelings and this was strongly supported by my son’s mom.  So my son grew up in touch with and aware of his inner feelings.

While he was growing up, so was I, and through many different avenues, therapy and spiritual work, I became more and more aware of how to put words to what was going on inside

One of the keys I learned was the power of vulnerability.  It has served me well and I taught it to my son.  Here is how it served me during the period of my life when I was a poet:

As a poet I needed a critic, someone who would tell me the truth about a given poem, what was good and what was not. I had to be open to hearing critical comments about phrases and poems that I thought were brilliant.  My poetry became better and better and from a very mediocre poet I became a very good second tier poet.  Then one day the muse of poetry left me and while I had a lot of years tied up in my career as a poet, I had to be vulnerable and let that which died, to pass on and allow the next stage of my life to commence.

Probably the place were vulnerability seems most inappropriate to most people is in the world of business, athletics and physical fitness.  Here I will tell you the few stories about my son, Cory.

During his formative years I had both told my son, and demonstrated in my actions about how a man succeeds by being vulnerable.

 Cory is now grown up; he is tall, strong, sensitive and intelligent.  When Cory finished college he got a job in a highly respected advertising firm and in the few years that he worked there he got promoted twice and was given very important assignments.  Cory told me that one key to his success was his vulnerability.  He would ask his boss questions and seek his boss’s advice about a work assignment if he came to a place he did not understand or was having a hard time doing the work.  His co-workers who were afraid to show that they did not know or understand the assignment would not ask the boss for help.  The boss then knew that he could count on Cory’s work because he did not avoid areas he did not know nor try and fake his way through a problem.  Cory got the promotions.

In the world of physical fitness and athletics, Cory had a special problem, he was born with a leaking heart valve and had to watch his exercises and what he did athletically.  When one is strong and well coordinated as Cory is, it is hard sometimes not to compete even though you should not.  But Cory would allow himself to be vulnerable and tell everybody that he had this heart condition that would not allow him to do certain exercises or certain form of athletics. 

In his twenties one sport Cory took up was paragliding.  [Not the type of sport that ones mother would feel too good about!]  But because Cory knew that he was vulnerable, he followed all the rules and learned all the necessary skills before he jumped off the high mountains.  He would not be “macho” and take stupid or unnecessary risks.  Literally the power of vulnerability allowed him to fly.

In my own life, after leaving one field of business and staring in an entirely different field of business, asset investment, I used the power of vulnerability to great advantage.  When investment opportunities came my way, I was well aware that I knew little about this very different world even though it was in the world of business and as I businessman I was supposed to know everything—but I did not know and I had been taught the power of vulnerability. 

So when investment opportunities came my way I would ask lots of questions.  When I got answers, frequently I did not understand what was being said, or the person speaking was using abbreviations or special language that was particular to that type of investment.  So I told the person who was trying to explain the situation to me was, “explain it like you would to a smart 12 year old”.  If they could not explain it so that I could understand what they were saying so that it made sense to me, I simply did not make the investment.  I now have a good base knowledge of investments and a decent success rate.  The paradox of being ignorant has made me much smarter than had I not laid claim to my ignorance.

I taught Cory to question that which does not make sense to him or that which he thinks is wrong.  Sometimes it is not comfortable for me when he challenges me on either my facts or in his feelings about our relationship.  But the dialogue between us is far better then the great empty gap that existed between my father any myself. 

One important final input:  the power of vulnerability allows the spirit to move into me and through me and has lead to a fulfilled life.

Mark Bloome

Mark Bloome teaches soul empowerment to advanced students

He is fully married, has a decent and imperfectly functioning family, and is a recognized art collector, an influence in Washington State politics, a philanthropist, good skier, and sophisticated investor. 

In a recent article in the Seattle Times he was described as a mix between Groucho Marx and Buddha and his home and garden characterized as one of the most beautiful in the Seattle area.